The Sad Home

In Sickness

Unknown Home

I had a really weird sleep paralysis dream the other day. It felt extremely real. I know that I haven't put up anything lately, other things got in the way. Any ways here we go.

It was a pretty busy day and I couldn't wait to sink into my bed, my eyes were heavy. I finally got home and was dead tired, it was in the middle of the day so I decided to just take a quick nap, I really wasn't feeling well. I went to sleep fairly quickly, I would wake up for a second and toss and turn not really fully awake. Then when I opened my eyes to turn and get more comfortable. I wasn’t on my bed anymore, I could clearly see I was in another room I didn't recognize. I couldn't move I was paralyzed, facing a door way. From what I could see by moving my eyes around, since I couldn't really move my head, the house looked black like not painted black, but burnt. Like it was covered in charcoal. I have never seen this house before, I had a burning sensation in my lungs. I tried moving and nothing was happening. I thought it was really weird but just because I am used to sleep paralysis doesn't particularly mean I enjoy it. So I tried holding my breath like I always have before to wake up. It was sort of my technique, if you will, to “snap out” of the episode or dream. So I held my breath and nothing happened, I gasped for air and this is when I started to panic a little. “This always fucking works” I thought to myself, in addition plenty of  the words “oh shit” and “fuck” came after while I was freaking out. I started looking around and I could still see the burnt room, the studs in the walls were visible through the black, charcoal, burnt mess. I tried  holding my breath again and still nothing I couldn't hold it anymore and started gasping for air a shock of pure terror shot through my body. I was worried for some reason that I wouldn't be able to breath next time, I was panicking. All of a sudden I start hearing a faint roaring, it sounded familiar, not like any animal or person, but….a fire.  The whooshing sound of flames started to fill the noiseless setting around me. The flames got louder and for some reason my eyes shot straight to the empty door way. A faint amber light started, I guess, manifesting itself and lit up the darkness beyond the door, it was a hallway. I could make out the structure of the hallway and other doors, at the end of the hallway there was a banister leading into a set of stairs going down. My eyes were fixated  towards the amber light, it looked like it was coming from the stair case. Then I see a head start coming up, slowly from what I can guess was the first floor. It reached the top of the stairs and I am freaking out screaming for help, at this moment I had forgotten where I fell asleep at. This was my reality, this was really happening to me, at least thats what I thought at the moment. 

I could see the figure, it looked like a woman the amber light behind her made it hard to see the face. Something was not right though she looked like she was running down the hallways toward me but, I know this sounds corny, it looked like she was running in slow motion. She was at a sprint and but looked slowed down. She started getting closer, she was booking it straight towards me, I tried moving and screaming and nothing I couldn’t move to save my life. As soon as she reached the door frame of the room she tumbled to the ground and fell towards me, I could see her face now, she looked like a normal caucasian woman, she was blond, she had a mom look not too old. Every nerve in the her face exposed fear and panic, she was screaming, her voice faint but frantic. She was looking straight at me yelling her mouth moving a little slower than real time. When she collapse on the floor and looked at me was when I realized that I was under a bed, I was at the very edge but I was mostly under the bed. She kept screaming, I calmed down a little bit seeing that she looked like a normal person, I went from holy fucking shit I am going to die, to what the hell is going on. I could almost read her mouth and lips, “Get out!” “Come on!” she repeated it over smacking the bed above me with every yell, by the demeanor of her face she was forcing every word, words that would never reach me. The roaring of what sounding like a fire started to come back, I could see the faint amber/orange glow getting brighter. My insides felt like they were on fire, my lungs burned more than they ever have. It felt like I was being pushed closer to death with each painful gasp. It was painfully hot, I saw tears running down her face. She looked around like people do when they are about to do something they are not suppose and are checking if any ones looking. This was strange for a second her whole body language and attitude switched, after looking around she look back at me and just stayed there. From her face I could only guess she was contemplating decisions in her head, but what? 

          

           

          All the while my lungs were still burning. I looked away from her and down the hallway again, I could see the fucking fire now! it wasn't a faint roar or a glow I could see the flames  on the ceiling at the end of the hallway, it started flowing down the hallway ceiling towards us, graceful like water but fierce, licking and snapping with every flame. Then it reached the top of the door frame and it started spilling over the border onto the ceiling of the room I was helplessly in. My attention was on the fire this whole time trying to breath, the house around me was beginning to burn. The flames started to slowly crawl down the wall I was facing, It was slow it looked alive, like it was thinking or something was controlling it, It would come down slowly then go a little faster but then in snap it would jump back up towards the ceiling. It seems silly but the closest thing I can compare it to would be like when a dog is on a leash, and its trying to go faster than the owner is walking, and then they pull the leash and the dog kinda jumps back. This fire was acting more like a pet than a force of nature. I know it sounds dumb but Im just telling it how I experienced it. 

        I had forgotten that the lady was in the room with me for second, and my attention was back on her she was still crying her tears leaving black streaks on her face. She was covering her ears rocking back and forth gritting her teeth, whispering something, her movement was still slowed down. As she shook her head I could clearly see her hair slowly rising and falling. All of a sudden she looks at me and her mouth slowly opens her facial expression slowly turns and I know she's about to scream something to me, I see her mouth the words “get out!” and slowly I start to hear them echoing  getting stronger and stronger. I finally hear the words, her facial expression turns from terror to anger as she lunges forward slowly going through the air. She has her arm outstretched like she's about to grab me, her hand, I could see it was burning, the top flesh peeling away reveling the pink tender burnt skin underneath, then it started to turn black, like burnt, charcoaled and it started cracking I could see it turning into ash, like the ash at the end of a lit cigarette, the closer it got to me. Her outstretch hand coming closer to my face, she's crying and still screaming falling towards me. Right then her had touches my face, the first thing that I felt was the rough texture of her black burnt hand, the second thing was I smelled was the ash, It was real, I could smell it. The third thing is something I cannot explain, I felt pain, I felt the hand start to burn my face. I remember screaming at the top of my lungs, her hand covering most of my face. I could see her right above me through her fingers, her neck was cracking and turning ashy white going slowly up towards her face. She stared into my eye, the one I was looking at her with, she was sobbing her face squished, her mouth contorted, showing intense sadness, emotional pain, and fear. I could see her mouth the last word she had for me “go” a tear rolled down her check and hung on her chin, it dropped headed straight for my eye. 

The tear hit my eye and in second I snapped awake gasping for air, like when you trip in a dream and you jump awake, it was exactly like that. I pushed myself up off the bed coughing I was covered in sweat, the bed sheets were damp. The sun was still up and it took me a second to realize where I was at. I exhaled in relief, I was in my room, on my bed, I could hear my kids playing in the living room. I went to the restroom to wash my face and wipe some sweat off. relieved that whatever that was, was over.

Everything I experienced felt extremely real, I tried to think and see if I could recognize the woman I saw but nothing came to mind. I also tried thinking about the house well at least the second floor and the room I was in, trying to remember if I had seen it any where but no luck. I couldn't see much of the room, I saw what looked like drawings on the corner of the floor, most were burnt and I could only see some of whatever was drawn, they looked like what a little kid would draw on plain white paper at school or arts and crafts. There were little dressers and like cubby holes in the corners of the room. I’ve had time to think about everything I didn't notice while I was experiencing it, it all hit me after I sat down and went through it from beginning to end in my head. Well any ways thank you for reading, if you like my blog please share with friends and family, I don't get paid or anything it just feels good sharing my life experiences, and connecting with people and I need your help to do that. So Thank you so much or reading and If I don't experience anything else this month, may you have a wonderful christmas, happy holidays stay safe.

Questions? Contact me anytime.

Email- danny.alv.602@gmail.com

Willing Terror Part 2.

                             Willing Terror 

Part 2

This is a continuation of Part 1. Thank you for reading..

I raised my hands and looked directly at them and just like that the scene that  I was dreaming about looked like it got ripped apart, like it was some background made of paper, and my dads living room came into focus. I was still staring at my hands, I could hear the rapid beating of my heart and with each deep, heavy thump I started breathing in slower and slower. My hands started to, what I could describe as disappearing, my palms were becoming see through and as the set of hands that were in front of me became more faint, I could see that my arms were now by my side as I lay normally. To my realization I could not move, of course the thought and images of that thing holding my arm came rushing through my head and a fierce vibration or white noise feeling immediately covered every part of my body. I wish it would just stop I had enough of this shit and fear turned into anger, I was literally angry just pure rage coming over me, I wanted to fight whatever was causing this. As soon as the anger and the thought of fighting came to mind, in a split second everything became quiet. I was again alone in this silent dream hell. I was facing the wall where my dad had his couch, I tried shoving my girlfriend and yelling “help, babe, wake up!” but of course nothing came out. While I was trying to wake up I started to hear faint coughing. Everything was silent except this distant couching and gasping. I tried to close my eyes but it was useless they would not shut. I looked around and I saw this fucking thing sitting on the couch it was pitch black, it looked like it was covered in charcoal. Its feet were splintered at the end of them, its thin legs also looked like it was made of black burnt wood pieces or something. Its head was what terrified me the most it looked cracked or broken with faint amber light coming through the cracks, It wasn't facing me, it was facing in the direction of my son. It kept coughing and gasping for air, its breaths were really rough like a horrible smokers throat. I screamed at it trying to get its attention, it flinched a little turning what I could only guess was its ear towards me. I yelled at it and and told it to leave, with all my might I tried to move but couldn’t. He didn't react or anything like it couldn't even hear me. This was all extremely real, I could swear if I tried hard enough I would be able to move or do something. All of a sudden my heart drops, it raises its thin, disgustingly burnt arm and points it at my son, I am literally scared to death. It goes to stand up, Im screaming and trying to kick stand up do something. For some reason I feel the faint emptiness in the back of my head, the same feeling I got going into sleep paralysis. I start concentrating on it trying to get it bigger. I don't really understand how this is happening since I am already in sleep paralysis, am I going deeper into this state of, I guess, being? The feeling starts to get bigger as this thing starts to advance towards my son. The feeling inside me started to grow, I think this thing could sense it, as the feeling grew stronger, the thing would walk slower, taking its paces slower. 

Movie: Insidious Part 1.

Finally I could feel it all over my body and in one swing motion with all my strength I try to move my arm and it shoots up. To my amazement I sit straight up and now Im staring directly at this thing! I yell at it one more time and I could hear my voice it echoes extremely loud I feel the whole apartment shake. It subsides and this thing turns and faces me. It had no face, It was just a round black hole that looked like a dying camp fire with the tips of some the splinters that made his whole body glowing. The best way I could explain is when you light a stick or log and you blow the flame out, there is this glow of the burned area and as you blow on it it gets brighter. I could see it breathing though all the little burnt out amber lights were slowly getting brighter and then dimmer. It was moving its head like it was taking in every detail of my face, I could smell it, it was like pure smoke, a burning sensation was filling my lungs until I couldn't take it anymore and I looked away and gasped for any fresh air not poisoned by this thing. As I took a deep breath in my eyes were watery and I turned quickly around, knowing I would have to face this thing again, slowly I turned my head and it was gone. My body suddenly felt extremely heavy, it felt like my core that allowed me to sit up was straining from all the weight and slowly I started to fall back down on back until I was completely flat and thats when I heard an ear splitting screech and my eyes shot open.

Thank god I was finally awake, the nightmare was over and I could go on and sleep. Of course I couldn’t, or didn't want to, I stood up and walked over to where this thing was sitting down at, examining it I don’t remember why, I mean thinking for one second that it was actually real makes me feel silly now. I guess I was just looking for some kind of evidence, these sleep paralysis episodes felt so real that maybe they could manipulate reality in some way. Which again feels like really silly again thinking about this now, but I was just straight out of sleep and wasn't really thinking straight.  

This is the first account of me ever being able to put myself into sleep paralysis, and also the first time I can remember ever being able to move in the frightening hell that is my sleep paralysis.  By far the most terrifying, I think because I didn’t personally felt in danger but I did feel like it was going to harm my son. Again its only a dream and it might seem sill to feel these emotions but when your in the moment of sleep paralysis it feels extremely real, the thought of this is just a dream doesn't cross your mind. Thank you everybody for reading.

Willing Terror (Part 1)

Willing Terror

My choice

For as long as I can remember these events were out of my control. Like I have said before I do not really look into these events I let others make their conclusions. Well a reason I do not look into this stuff is I feel like ignoring it is like a dam, holding everything back. I have a strong feeling that if I did open up to the paranormal or ghosts, whatever you want to call it, it would all rush in. I have eerie feeling that I would be seeing, hearing and experiencing way more than the little bit I deal with now. I do not have any interest in contacting anything out of this world, and I feel like I may have the ability and really don't want it. Its like the little bit that I feel, like when I cannot be alone because I feel like someone is watching me, or when I am going to sleep and I hear screams sometimes that shoot me out of sleep. I feel like these are just the little bit coming through the cracks of my so called dam. Wether these are good spirits or not, I really do not want anything to do with the so called paranormal, if you believe in it or not. I still find the whole concept fascinating don't get me wrong, but I wish that thats just what it was stories and videos, for me personally. I thought it was appropriate to start off that way because this blog is about how I did indulge in the whole sleep paralysis thing once. I will never do that again. This is the first time I found out I had the ability to put myself into sleep paralysis. 

We were staying at my dads for while. I was trying to save money to get our own apartment and be on our own. We were there probably about a month or so. We didn't have internet or anything, I didn't have wifi or my video games so all my usual daily distractions were gone. I decided to try to make new distractions which was a bad idea. I started reading and learning about the whole paranormal realm, I decided that something that fascinated me would be a good way to pass the time and I would learn something new in the mean time. Well I started to play with the notion that this was real, the whole spirit plane and psychics and being able to communicate with the spirits was an actual possible thing. When I came across something explaining how to astro project. Basically out of body experiences, well on this one article it explained a few steps on how to achieve and control your dreams. You can fly on command and the dream world around you is up to your manipulation, lucid dreaming they called it. Well of course this sounded really cool so I started to think about this all day. 

Night came fairly quick it was my day off so I had just spent the day with the family. We made our beds on the living room floor, thats where we were sleeping for the time being. I had almost forgot about this whole control your dreams thing, until I started to fall asleep I was drifting in and out of consciousness when I saw what looked like black vines start going up the wall behind the tv that was in the living room. It kinda shocked me cause I stood up and focus more on the wall and it was gone. Stupid shadows I told myself and just laughed at my self for being startled of innocent shadows I thought were coming from the little slits of light breaking through the blinds. Well I am fully awake now since the startle got a little bit of adrenaline going through me and I decide to play on my phone which was a desperate move on my part because with no wifi and just cell service it was slow as  fuck. I unlock my phone and the first thing that pops up is that article I was reading about lucid dreaming, which I found strange. I did not recall leaving the article up or even reading it for a couple of hours. Anyways I was bored, no one else was up, my girlfriend was asleep next to me and my two kids were sleeping on the couch next to us. I looked at the article and said what the hell lets try this shit. So determined to control my own dreams, I began.

So I began to read the instructions and did as they said. I laid on my back with arms on my side. Started to take deep breaths in and out, laying there motionless. I started to feel like an itch everywhere on my body, it wasn't all at once just various different parts, like a little itch on my elbow or knee, then thigh. The article said this would happen, I guess it was the bodies way of seeing if I was really asleep or some shit like that. The article said to fight to urge to scratch the itch and it would slowly go away. I was laying for about 30 min just still and I started feeling stupid for trying it. I decided to give up and get comfortable to sleep and decided that I would still try the other steps it described. The article stated once you were sleeping or dreaming to try and look at your hands. Whatever you were doing to look down or bring your hands up to your face and this would enable you to be able to control your dreams, and that they would become extremely vivid. So I began to drift into sleep, I dreamt for a while until all of a sudden I started hearing myself like an echo, “look at your hands” over and over again. Until my hands started to slowly raise and as soon as I seen my hands everything just swooshed into clarity in a snap. It was no longer the normal fuzzy dreams I mostly have, everything was really vivd, clear and kind of real. This all happened in what felt like a second. What happened directly after that is what still weirds me out.

As soon as my hands come into focus and everything just clicked clear. I heard what sounded like a really low growl, I know it seems a little over played or cliche but thats I heard I mean I was still dreaming so I guess anything was possible. Any way I heard something like that and then for just an instant these pair of red eyes came into focus, as I saw them my hands became see through kinda foggy exposing these eyes more.  I wasn't scared or anything it happened so fast I didn't really have time to react or anything its just something that I remember and I started slowly being able to I guess tell myself what to do in my dreams. This went on for the rest of the night until I woke up in the morning. 

That day was pretty normal, I remember being really tired at night after work and all that, but it was to the point of exhaustion. The more I laid in bed the more I felt like I was being drained. I went to sleep quickly I don’t know how long it was into my deep sleep when I started experiencing the feeling I always get before going into sleep paralysis. Its a very difficult feeling to describe but it starts, for me, in the back of my head its kind of like a pulsating feeling like a light headedness but just in the back of your head, it travels down my spine until it envelopes me. Sometimes its so quick I do not even realize I am in it until I try to move. As soon as this feeling got a hold of me I knew what was coming so I decided to play with it a little I woke up and it was dark everyone was still asleep. So I laid there  and tried to recreate the feeling and It started really faintly but it grew as I concentrated more. I had the whole image of what I was facing though this whole time and then all of a sudden I felt my whole body tingling and as soon as that happened I knew I was not going to be able to move pretty soon but I knew I was asleep already, I don't know if that makes sense. I raised my hands to see them and I couldn’t, shit I said, did I wait too long to try it. I tried again with my left hand since I was laying down on my right arm with my hand turned down so I could see my wrist. I was still in the living room facing the wall and thats all I could see. So I tried again to put my hand up so I could see it and turn my right hand so that I was facing the palms of my hands, but again couldn’t, I was about to give up and hold my breath to snap out of it, but I noticed a pressure on my wrist. I tried so hard to look behind me but couldn’t. I tried to to move my arm again, and as I tried to raise it I again felt the pressure. “What the fuck is that” I told myself I have never felt anything like that before. One last time, with everything I had I tried pulling my hand up and it would just budge a little, I looked down as far as I could with just my eyes since I couldn't move my head, and then I saw it, just a glimpse, but I fucking saw it. Wrapped around my wrist was a hand, seeing it I could now feel the individual fingers on my wrist, I was freaking out kind of panicking I….could feel it. It wasn't big enough to be an adults hand but it was little like a kids hand or medium I guess. Once I saw it I started shaking and yelling and the intense vibration or tingling feeling just devoured me, more powerful than I have ever felt. I yelled “Let Go!” and in that second just like that the tingling stopped and everything went quiet. The ringing noise that came with the vibration subsided and out of the calm soothing silence I hear a raspy but sorta high pitched voice whisper “no”. I flinched and was more terrified than ever. I calmed down and again in my head yelled “leave me alone”, again everything went quiet  and I waited like prey at the mercy of the hunter. Nothing, not a whisper or feeling, nothing, I was relieved but still in the sleep paralysis episode. I still couldn't move so I tried calming down and started thinking about other things until eventually I just started dreaming. It was normal dreams I was flying or some generic shit like that. I felt the tingly feeling and without thinking about it I raised my hands and looked directly at them and just like that the scene that I was dreaming about looked liked it got ripped apart, like it was some background made of paper, and my dads living room came into focus. 

To Be Continued….. 

Ill end it here ladies and gentlemen I don’t really like having my blogs be too long just for the sake of someone losing interest because of it being too long. The 2nd half will be a lot shorter, but its the most terrifying thing I have experienced so keep an eye out for it tomorrow. Thank you for reading if you enjoy it please share with friends or Family. Thank you for giving it a read everybody, I will continue this one tomorrow. 

Night Children

Night Children

Not Very Fun

Well this particular event was really strange for me. The occurrences seemed to happen through out the day leading up to the night. It was a particular weird day, I work at a semi empty building checking doors and exits, offices, computers and stuff like that. Well I usually walk around no problem but this day was strange. While walking around the building I just felt like I was being followed. I kept seeing things in the corners of my eyes, it would be just for a split second but it would make me jump. When I would look left and right I would see figures running behind walls and at times I would be able to look directly at them before they disappeared, creeped me out. Many times they would seem like children. I would shrug it off and try really hard to keep myself from panicking. you know when you get scared and start running and you have that feeling in the back of your neck that someones going to grab you. Well I would start feeling this when I would see something dash behind corners and my body would respond in panic and every nerve in my body would be screaming at me to run. I would just start to hum and started saying to myself calm down, calm down, calm down. I would begin to feel real jumpy for the rest of the shift. I would also hear voices coming from conference rooms like giggling and and I swear I would hear children whispering “sshhhh” as I would walk by empty offices. 

There is actually a big part of the building that I would always be hesitant to go into because it would just feel off. The doors to this section of the building are the kind with little windows like this

Well this section is closed and only a hand full of people can access it, the other people who had access were never really around they were more management type people that would drop in once in a while and not a day to day worker type deal. Well while walking by this particular door I turned to open the door and looked through this window for just a second I saw this little child size black shadow disappear into a wall. It was a split second but I could see it clearly. There before me was this child like dark entity running into a fucking wall, well I never told anyone. I felt like if I said it out loud and it was out in the open that it would make it more, I guess, real. In my own mind and thoughts it could be whatever I want it to be. and now typing this Its still surreal. Its becoming real, but I still tell myself it could've been anything. I believe that seeing stuff from the corners of my eyes can be shrugged off to being tired or my imagination playing tricks on me. I usually go with these two reasons but when I keep seeing stuff over and over again every time I would turn my head it was just getting a little hard to blame it on my imagination. I could not even get a thought in before I would see something else. I would be in the middle of telling myself that it was nothing and then I would see some thing else dash out of sight. 

The whole shift kind of went like this it got to the point where towards the end of the shift I wouldn't even go and walk around like I was suppose to, because I felt like something was waiting for me in the buildings hallways and empty rooms. When it was time to go home walking out of the building, for some reason I was screaming at my self “don’t turn around. don’t look back, don’t look back, don’t look back.” As soon as I left the property it felt like a weight was lifted off of me. I mean I would get creeped out from time to time since it was a semi empty building in the day and completely empty int he after noon after all the employees had gone home for the day, but that was the only reason, it was just creepy being alone and your mind starts reminding you of all the scary movies you watched. It was just a normal scared you know? This day it was just different I genuinely felt fear, and danger. Seeing so much shit running out of sight and only catching glimpses of stuff from the corner of my eyes. Seeing that shadow just terrified me, but somehow I was still trying to playing it off, like that could've been a reflection of my shirt on the glass or some shit not trying to admit what I saw. Any way like I said once I left the property I felt relieved, the drive home was nothing special just a normal drive while I sank into my everyday thoughts. 

When I got into my little town house complex it was around 10:27 p.m. so I drove to my parking space which was the last in the row of spaces and standing there about two car spaces away from me was a little girl, she looked about 4 years old a little older than my daughter. She stood there staring at me, I didn't think anything of it until I realized there was no one else around I looked around as I parked my car and nothing. I slowly started to open my door to get out and she still just stood there. I closed my door, looked at her, and she waived and smiled at me, I went to waive back and she darted behind a car. The only other car parked there other than mine, I stood there thinking her parents were in the red sedan she ran behind two spaces away. Waiting for the car door to open or the little light to come on in the car, but nothing. I stood there kinda forcing a smile and laugh thinking her parents were in the car and they were looking at me, but still nothing. The night was dead quiet, I stood there about 3 min and nothing ever happened, either this little girl was still behind there hiding or some shit like that. So I started walking towards the car but kinda acting like I wasn't really going to check if she was there, kind of like I was already going in that direction, still expecting someone to be there, a parent or an adult you know. So I kinda wandered slowly towards the car trying not to stare directly at it, I reached the front and started passing it, I got to the side where the little girl ran behind and my heart kind of sank. There was nothing, no little girl no one in the car, nothing. I stood there not really wanting to move due to fear. I tried to rationalize it but none of the common bullshit I tell myself was working this little girl or whatever was standing there smiling and waiving at me. I just stood there not knowing what to do, I started to look into the car and it was empty, looked under the car, nothing, and this was a wide open area so there were no corners or building she could run behind if she even managed to slip away without me seeing. I was alone in the parking lot, just not wanting to accept what I just saw, this little girl just vanished.

I walked into my house and obviously my face showed discomfort because my girlfriend asked if everything was ok. I told her everything was ok not knowing if she would even believe me actually seeing something. As the night went on I kinda pushed it into the back of my mind with video games and food. I eventually felt silly about the whole thing and told my girlfriend. She thought it was just weird and kinda didn't really pay much mind to it, so I didn't really go into detail and left it at that. That night went pretty normal I played video games until I was tired. I decided to go to sleep around 2:45 in the morning kinda forgetting every thing that went on that day. I fell asleep quickly and I don’t really know how long I was asleep for all of a sudden I feel that tingly feeling, that white noise all over my body kind of thing that I have explained in my other blogs. I opened my eyes, I was staring at my wall in the same position that I had fallen asleep. I heard my daughters voice right behind me and I went to turn around and I couldn’t. I was paralyzed I wouldn't have been this frightened but I heard what I thought was my daughters voice again right next to my ear whispering “daddy, hi” My whole body was shaking and tingling just pure fear everywhere. I couldn't move I felt whatever it was breathing on me, I was screaming at my girlfriend and trying with all my might to push her, wake her up, something. I was in the middle of screaming when I felt this little hand reach over my face and kind of start playing with my girlfriends hair, who was laying in front of me. The “holding my breath” technique didn't even come to mind because it was just so fucking real. I swear to god I was awake, I just couldn't move. I laid there staring at this little hand touching my girlfriend and feeling some weight on my back. When it stopped playing with her hair the little hand moved to my forehead and started rubbing it whispering “ssshhh” over and over again. I tried rocking, kind of trying to move my shoulder to get her off and it didn't work. Then I felt both her hands grab my head and slowly started turning it towards where she was standing or kneeling on the bed behind me. What was weird was not only was my head turning but my body would turn with it. My head and chest would be staring at the same direction the whole time I was being turned. I tried screaming and stopping myself from seeing what this thing was behind me. I felt hot breath on my neck and then left cheek, until I was face to face with this thing. 

It was in all shapes and forms a little girl, she had light brown hair from what I could tell with the little light coming through the window from the roof light of the town house next to us, her hair came down to her eyes. She looked a little dark skinned, like tan, was wearing what looked like light blue jean overalls, she looked like a totally normal kid until she reached and fixed her hair. She had no eyes, just empty black pits in her face or at least I thought they were empty, she grinned and raised her head and I saw a reflection or glimmer of the light next door. She had pitch black eyes that would shimmer every time she moved. She just stood there looking at me and I yelled with everything I had “get away from me!” She stood there and I heard this dry kind of like a smokers laugh, very deep and just raspy coming form this little girls mouth. Then she said “see you soon” and just bolted for the door running past it and the door just slammed shut. That split second the door slammed it made really loud noise and I shot awake staring at the wall like I had fallen asleep, the loud noise still ringing in my ear. For a minute or two I just laid there not knowing if I heard the door slam in my dream or I heard it for that split second I was awake. It is really hard to explain but it was like the door slammed and woke me up and I also thought I heard like the windows vibrating in the room for a second after the sound ripped me out of my sleep. It was just bizarre. I woke up my girlfriend just to have another person awake and to calm myself down. I don't really remember the excuse for waking her up but it relieved me, and  I just laid there, I couldn't go back to sleep so I just got up and played video games until the sun started to come up. I went back to bed still thinking about what happened just the whole day kept playing itself over and over again in my head. At this point I was just trying to keep my sanity throwing it all to coincidence, it was just simpler. 

I eventually fell back asleep for a couple of hours. That night was actually one of the few  times I could not really tell 100% if I was awake or asleep. I can still see her face, every detail, those big black shimmery eyes and that just evil looking grin, this thing looked satisfied with the amount of fear and just pure terror it was causing me. Maybe it was just saying hi, I don't really know if anyone might have some similar experiences with anything of this nature. Just children of the corn shit. Well thank you for reading if you have any questions or just want to chat I can be found on Hangouts app for Google+ thank you.

This Is Me

Hi everyone just wanted to say a little something. My next blog will be put up hopefully tomorrow depending if I have can make time to finish typing it up. I realize that my blogs are not really the most proffesionaly written. I am in no shape or form a proffesional writer. Yes my grammar might suck and the sentences might go in everywhich way but these blogs are not made up and are not rehearsed in any way whatsoever. I type things as I remember them and type whatever thoughts I get while typing. My thoughts come in rapidly and so that is how I type. So I hope my blogs will not be compared to well written fictional or non-fictional story that someone took the time to come up or research and spent thd time checking grammar and sentence structers and all that. This is me, these are actual events in my life. Im not here to try to explain anything, I leave that up to you guys any assesments you make, or conclusions you get from my experiences are yours. I am just typing the events as they happend to me, Im not really into the whole spirit ghosts thing, I do find it interesting and Im not saying its not true, Im just in the middle, trying to keep the wonder in a boring everyday world alive if you will. I would like to think there is something out there we can't explain, something that lets us know theres more to this everyday world, that kinda fuzzes the lines of reality or at leasts wrinkles it from time to time. So please read and enjoy, make your assesments and conlusions on what you think these events are, and please remember that I am no pro at writting, you can contact me anytime, always love a good conversation.  Im just laying it out as it is, as it happened or is happening to me. So thank you for reading and goodnight.

Old Hag Syndrome

Door Way

Old Hag Syndrome

        The old hag syndrome is a phenomenon that is explained as a old woman coming into your bedroom while experiencing sleep paralysis. She proceeds to sit on your chest and then it becomes really hard to breath. Many people say that she may start screaming in your face and others say she might reach out and grab your neck and proceed to strangle you. It is one the most common sleep paralysis episode individuals have. I personally never experienced this event, in this manner, I have seen people like figures but never the loss of breath that comes with the old hag syndrome. This is one account that I will never forget. A couple years ago a couple of friends invited to a little gathering and I was hesitant on going since I have always been kinda of an introvert. Well they talked me into it and I ended up going, I was under the impression that there would be music and drinks but it was just a little gathering as they had described it. The tv was on and everyone was sorta doing their own thing. As soon as I walked in the house my whole mood just switched. I just felt jumpy for some reason,  like you know when your walking through a haunted house and you are just waiting for someone to jump out at you and grab you or scare you. I know I am an introvert and don’t really like parties but I never once felt like this before just darkness all around me. I tried shaking it off and go on about my business but just couldn’t. As the night went on I ran into the owner of the home, he was sort of a friend of a friend that I didn't really know him that well. We talked about many different subjects and some how ended up talking about ghosts and aliens and the super natural of course this is always a fun and entertaining subject.  We got into this topic pretty deep and then he said “come with me, you are going to love this.” He led me to the garage, I started feeling a sort of empty pit sensation in my stomach, every thing in me was kinda like revving up and going fool throttle. Have you ever watched a horror movie and knew that there was going to be something popping up pretty soon and scare you, like bathroom scenes in scary movies where they open the medicine cabinet with the mirror and just know someone is going to be standing there when they close it. For a split second you hold your breath and prepare yourself, that is exactly the same feeling I was getting with every step getting closer and closer to the entrance of the garage, and I just could not explain why. I remember thinking to myself “what’s going on?”  “Why am I feeling like this?”, I just could not shake off the feeling that there was something wrong, something was not right. When we reached the garage door, I held my breath for a split second, just knowing 100% that something was going to jump out at me. When he opened the door my heart sank. There in the middle of the candle lit room was a Ouija board. And in an instance I thought could this be it, No, is this why I felt really off. I thought it was just ridiculous thinking that I even had some sort of ability to sense this. Moreover, I turned and kinda of just giggled not trying to show my discomfort. Didn’t want to feel uncool. He also smiled and said they have been trying it all night, my mind was going really fast trying to tell myself these boards weren't real that they don't work. Fake or not I wanted to get out of there quick. The walk back to the living room was just blurry I heard him talking but didn’t really listen his voice was just faded and kinda in the background. My thoughts were in the forefront and taking all the attention I could possibly muster up, I made a bullshit excuse a couple of minutes later wanting to leave due to the fact that I could not shake off this looming feeling of just darkness. Since I stepped foot out into the quiet I didn't really realize how noisy it was in the house with every one talking in their separate conversations accompanied by the tv. For some strange reason as soon as the dead quiet of the night hit me It just felt more crowded like I was surrounded by people, it just hard to explain, its like when people say that they still feel lonely with so many people around but just reversed, don't know if that makes sense. The drive home was extremely uncomfortable. I literally felt like something or someone was in my back seat. The hairs on my neck were straight up the whole way home. I kept looking at my review mirror genuinely not knowing if I would see someone. At the same time I would scream at myself not to look in my back seat for I might see something, at one point I felt that someone was screaming into the back of my head. When I got home even my room and house did not feel the same. Like when you walk into a friends house and don't really know what to do with your body. Just felt off. 

That night was really rough just trying to fall asleep, I mean it was about 2:30 in the morning and my thoughts were still kind of running around in my head. That first night was hard to fall asleep but eventually did. I had a vague dream basically I remember waking up not being able to move and just staring at the ceiling and in the bottom corner of my eye I saw and heard the top left corner of my bedroom door slowly opening. Thats all I could remember, I mean I was paralyzed, but it still felt like a dream you know, like fuzzy it didn't feel like I was really awake. Couple days go by and at some point during the night I have the same dream, exactly the same, I wake up looking at the ceiling not being able to move and I see my door open again. I just shook it off not really paying attention to it and would forget about it as the day went by. Well this kept happening through the week and for some reason the dream would become clearer  and clearer. Until one night it changed completely. That day there was nothing out of the ordinary just a simple old day with school and whatever. I fell asleep that night fairly quickly not wanting to play video games or look at dumb shit on my phone. I remember having normal well not normal but the run of the mill dreams, of flying, super strength you know weird dream events. And then it happened it felt like I was slingshotted awake. Like when you plummet down a big roller coaster and you feel your stomach tighten and your throat closes for an instance, thats the exact feeling I got the moment before my eyes shot open. I was awake looking around my room stilling trying to deal with the empty stomach feeling I experienced a couple seconds ago. I went to reach for my phone but quickly realized that I wasn't fully awake, I couldn't move at all. I was experiencing sleep paralysis, and the literally the first thought that came to my head was, “ok here we go, goddammit.” I went to hold my breath since that was the quickest solution to waking out of this, that I had figured out by trial and error. Any ways I went to hold my breath to try to wake up and I see my door creak open and slowly open. I just laid there curious to see why it had been opening before. As it fully opened I saw a dark figure standing in the doorway looked like a woman just petit and small black figure. She reached her hand out and pointed at me with her finder. It looked really skinny like a really old and long finger. I tried screaming but nothing came out, she then proceeded to put her finger to her lips, or what I assume was her lips since her face was all black, like she was telling me to quiet down. I kept screaming and still couldn't get anything out, she proceeded to reach out her finger again and started curling her finger at me, like when people say come here with just there finger and she was doing it really slowly she would not step foot in my room for some reason. I would shake my head at her and trying to move with all my force just pure fear striking me every second. I felt my whole body start tingling, imagine when your foot falls asleep and it kinda feels like white noise on your tv, just tingling, thats how my whole body starting feeling just without the whole tickling feeling that makes you laugh, plain tingling all over.. She wouldn't leave just stood  at the doorway, staring at me the only thing moving was her outreached hand calling me with her corpse like finger.  And then I noticed something, she wasn't alone, I saw a head slowly appear from behind this woman, sort of like someone was  standing up. It was much taller and resembled a man. I then noticed the woman wasn't a solid figure but a little see through and behind her was this tall lean black figure. I tried with all my might to snap out of it and move or wake up. And slowly the man behind the woman started shaking his head, as if saying thats not going to work.  I eventually woke up sweating like crazy gasping for air apparently I was trying my “hold my breath technique” and it was just not working, but somehow it eventually did. I stood and immediately turned on my light and just stared at my door. It was closed and I was just holding my breath not wanting to open it waiting for someone or something to start to open it. I turned my t.v on and just stayed sitting there staring at my door. I finally saw the sun start coming up, it kinda calmed me down, when I heard my dads alarm go off for work and heard him start to get ready I swung open my door and went to lay down, more calm now but still jogging the thought of what I saw and how real it felt in my mind. Couple minutes later I was finally able to get some sleep.  

This dream would reoccur for about 3 weeks every night, yes every single night.  Some variation would happen of course sometimes the thing or man behind the womanly figure wouldn't appear. an sometimes he would wave at me. What was also pretty weird was that the nights that I left my door open she would just appear at my door way, and when I closed my door she would open it when the episode would begin. About halfway through the 4th week of having this same sleep paralysis dream or episode. Things changed a little bit. It started out like it usually does, I awoke suddenly realizing that I was paralyzed and couldn't move. I looked straight at my door and said to myself “shit, here she comes.” So the door opens and she's standing there and again sticks out her finger and calls, I hear her fucking voice, she tells me loud and clear, “just come over here” he voice was crackling and really dry. For the first time in weeks of having this dream I sat up and stood out of bed, trying with every bit of my strength to stop myself but I had no control over my body. As I was witnessing myself slowly taking steps towards this thing or woman. I started to get close enough to actually be able to tell features on this things face. She was smirking looking straight at me with her hand reached out still but not stepping foot in my bedroom, at her feet I saw what looked like man curled up behind her since she was still see through. I screamed and yelled and tried moving and just couldn’t. Then all of a sudden I start hearing my moms voice like echoing very faint but still audible. My mom’s voice grew louder and I noticed the woman’s smirk was gone and she just stayed there staring at me. I eventually slowly woke up and still heard my mom yelling for me that breakfast was ready. I have never woken up to it being daytime already it was always some time in the night. Any ways a couple of days go by and Im still having these dreams back to back. I eventually gave in due to the fact that I started hating or better yet dreading going to sleep because I knew the old woman/thing was going to visit me, and told my mom and girlfriend what was going on. I kinda introduced it as a joke at first not knowing how they would react, but eventually I got serious and came clean letting them know this was really happening to me. My mom surprisingly took it pretty seriously after I told her the whole story and gave me some advice on what to do. Make a prayer here and there during the night. My girlfriend took it seriously too since she is kinda in the whole supernatural  phenomenon thing. She in turn spoke to her grandma which is also into the whole spirits thing owning minerals, spirit rocks, tarot cards, pendulums to communicate with spirits and so on and so forth. Well she contacted me and said some thing might have latched onto me. She gave me some thing called  sage and a black candle. Her instructions were to light the candle and burn the sage and walk around the room with it and trace the doorway with it. I felt pretty silly doing all this but I was desperate for any help. I mean having sleep paralysis with the same events, same woman and figure behind her appearing at my door for over a month straight night after night non-stop, I was feeling like I was going crazy and the last couple of days I just didn't care, like if I did go to her. Anyways I started doing the whole black candle sage thing and slowly it started to kinda stop. It wasn't an immediate halt but over the next day few days it would fade slowly into feeling like it was a dream again. You know fuzzy, when you know you dreamt it but sometimes not really memorable. After couple of weeks I just stopped having this episode happen to me altogether. So it was a little over a month of have this thing visit me while being sunken into sleep paralysis. Huge relief knowing that it was over. Got more events that have happened to me that stand out to me that I would like to share. Check back in later for other weird occurrences of my life.

Sleep/Wake Paralysis

Introduction

Well I have been holding on to my experiences with sleep paralysis. Don't know if any one will read this but here is my info and experiences with sleep paralysis. It feels pretty good getting this off my chest. This will be just some info about me. I have a lot of strange experiences with this phenomenon. If you are interested let me know in the comments and I will share many experiences. Ive never done this before, this is my very first blog.

 

     I have been dealing with sleep paralysis for as long as I can remember, it used to be a little better than it is now, only being paralyzed from time to time. A couple years ago I started experiencing it every time I slept. This means I would experience something every night, every nap of course some episodes more severe than others.  Every time I closed my eyes and experience anything close to sleep, I would experience something unusual, some times quick and easy; other times realistic and terrifying. It just happened so often I didn't really think much about it after a while, kind of just dreading having to go to sleep. It became apparent that nothing I could do would save me from having a restless terrifying night. So after a while I would try to mentally prepare myself going in, trying reassure myself that its's just a dream. Many of my friends and co-workers have little to no experience with sleep paralysis , so trying to discuss it with them really never got me anywhere. Many of the things I would see were shadow people and children, always surrounding me wherever I fell asleep be it the couch or bed. What really made me start questioning my sanity was noticing stuff in my room misplaced or moved. Majority of the time the child or black figure I would witness while being paralyzed would knock, kick various items in my room, also scatter and run around, hide in my closets. When the sun would come up and with it my bravery, I would see various items not where I had left them. I always just shook it off to my parents or siblings moving stuff while is slept. But now, years later, I have my own home and family, and these occurrences still continue to this day. 

    I have indulged into every aspect of sleep paralysis and still cannot prevent myself from sinking into it. I have experienced this phenomenon so much that I can willingly put myself into sleep paralysis. Of course I have only  tried this on separate occasion not really too fond of this ability. In addition I also found out that the best and quickest way for me to lets say "snap out of it" is to hold my breath, found out just by trial and error. Some people who I have talked to that also experience sleep paralysis have discussed looking at a clock, or trying to stare at their hands would do the trick. I have many experiences I would like to share, if this does well or if at least one person is interested in reading and discussing this more I will put out another blog of each of my other worldly experiences. Thank you for reading and goodnight.