The Sad Home

In Sickness

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I had a really weird sleep paralysis dream the other day. It felt extremely real. I know that I haven't put up anything lately, other things got in the way. Any ways here we go.

It was a pretty busy day and I couldn't wait to sink into my bed, my eyes were heavy. I finally got home and was dead tired, it was in the middle of the day so I decided to just take a quick nap, I really wasn't feeling well. I went to sleep fairly quickly, I would wake up for a second and toss and turn not really fully awake. Then when I opened my eyes to turn and get more comfortable. I wasn’t on my bed anymore, I could clearly see I was in another room I didn't recognize. I couldn't move I was paralyzed, facing a door way. From what I could see by moving my eyes around, since I couldn't really move my head, the house looked black like not painted black, but burnt. Like it was covered in charcoal. I have never seen this house before, I had a burning sensation in my lungs. I tried moving and nothing was happening. I thought it was really weird but just because I am used to sleep paralysis doesn't particularly mean I enjoy it. So I tried holding my breath like I always have before to wake up. It was sort of my technique, if you will, to “snap out” of the episode or dream. So I held my breath and nothing happened, I gasped for air and this is when I started to panic a little. “This always fucking works” I thought to myself, in addition plenty of  the words “oh shit” and “fuck” came after while I was freaking out. I started looking around and I could still see the burnt room, the studs in the walls were visible through the black, charcoal, burnt mess. I tried  holding my breath again and still nothing I couldn't hold it anymore and started gasping for air a shock of pure terror shot through my body. I was worried for some reason that I wouldn't be able to breath next time, I was panicking. All of a sudden I start hearing a faint roaring, it sounded familiar, not like any animal or person, but….a fire.  The whooshing sound of flames started to fill the noiseless setting around me. The flames got louder and for some reason my eyes shot straight to the empty door way. A faint amber light started, I guess, manifesting itself and lit up the darkness beyond the door, it was a hallway. I could make out the structure of the hallway and other doors, at the end of the hallway there was a banister leading into a set of stairs going down. My eyes were fixated  towards the amber light, it looked like it was coming from the stair case. Then I see a head start coming up, slowly from what I can guess was the first floor. It reached the top of the stairs and I am freaking out screaming for help, at this moment I had forgotten where I fell asleep at. This was my reality, this was really happening to me, at least thats what I thought at the moment. 

I could see the figure, it looked like a woman the amber light behind her made it hard to see the face. Something was not right though she looked like she was running down the hallways toward me but, I know this sounds corny, it looked like she was running in slow motion. She was at a sprint and but looked slowed down. She started getting closer, she was booking it straight towards me, I tried moving and screaming and nothing I couldn’t move to save my life. As soon as she reached the door frame of the room she tumbled to the ground and fell towards me, I could see her face now, she looked like a normal caucasian woman, she was blond, she had a mom look not too old. Every nerve in the her face exposed fear and panic, she was screaming, her voice faint but frantic. She was looking straight at me yelling her mouth moving a little slower than real time. When she collapse on the floor and looked at me was when I realized that I was under a bed, I was at the very edge but I was mostly under the bed. She kept screaming, I calmed down a little bit seeing that she looked like a normal person, I went from holy fucking shit I am going to die, to what the hell is going on. I could almost read her mouth and lips, “Get out!” “Come on!” she repeated it over smacking the bed above me with every yell, by the demeanor of her face she was forcing every word, words that would never reach me. The roaring of what sounding like a fire started to come back, I could see the faint amber/orange glow getting brighter. My insides felt like they were on fire, my lungs burned more than they ever have. It felt like I was being pushed closer to death with each painful gasp. It was painfully hot, I saw tears running down her face. She looked around like people do when they are about to do something they are not suppose and are checking if any ones looking. This was strange for a second her whole body language and attitude switched, after looking around she look back at me and just stayed there. From her face I could only guess she was contemplating decisions in her head, but what? 

          

           

          All the while my lungs were still burning. I looked away from her and down the hallway again, I could see the fucking fire now! it wasn't a faint roar or a glow I could see the flames  on the ceiling at the end of the hallway, it started flowing down the hallway ceiling towards us, graceful like water but fierce, licking and snapping with every flame. Then it reached the top of the door frame and it started spilling over the border onto the ceiling of the room I was helplessly in. My attention was on the fire this whole time trying to breath, the house around me was beginning to burn. The flames started to slowly crawl down the wall I was facing, It was slow it looked alive, like it was thinking or something was controlling it, It would come down slowly then go a little faster but then in snap it would jump back up towards the ceiling. It seems silly but the closest thing I can compare it to would be like when a dog is on a leash, and its trying to go faster than the owner is walking, and then they pull the leash and the dog kinda jumps back. This fire was acting more like a pet than a force of nature. I know it sounds dumb but Im just telling it how I experienced it. 

        I had forgotten that the lady was in the room with me for second, and my attention was back on her she was still crying her tears leaving black streaks on her face. She was covering her ears rocking back and forth gritting her teeth, whispering something, her movement was still slowed down. As she shook her head I could clearly see her hair slowly rising and falling. All of a sudden she looks at me and her mouth slowly opens her facial expression slowly turns and I know she's about to scream something to me, I see her mouth the words “get out!” and slowly I start to hear them echoing  getting stronger and stronger. I finally hear the words, her facial expression turns from terror to anger as she lunges forward slowly going through the air. She has her arm outstretched like she's about to grab me, her hand, I could see it was burning, the top flesh peeling away reveling the pink tender burnt skin underneath, then it started to turn black, like burnt, charcoaled and it started cracking I could see it turning into ash, like the ash at the end of a lit cigarette, the closer it got to me. Her outstretch hand coming closer to my face, she's crying and still screaming falling towards me. Right then her had touches my face, the first thing that I felt was the rough texture of her black burnt hand, the second thing was I smelled was the ash, It was real, I could smell it. The third thing is something I cannot explain, I felt pain, I felt the hand start to burn my face. I remember screaming at the top of my lungs, her hand covering most of my face. I could see her right above me through her fingers, her neck was cracking and turning ashy white going slowly up towards her face. She stared into my eye, the one I was looking at her with, she was sobbing her face squished, her mouth contorted, showing intense sadness, emotional pain, and fear. I could see her mouth the last word she had for me “go” a tear rolled down her check and hung on her chin, it dropped headed straight for my eye. 

The tear hit my eye and in second I snapped awake gasping for air, like when you trip in a dream and you jump awake, it was exactly like that. I pushed myself up off the bed coughing I was covered in sweat, the bed sheets were damp. The sun was still up and it took me a second to realize where I was at. I exhaled in relief, I was in my room, on my bed, I could hear my kids playing in the living room. I went to the restroom to wash my face and wipe some sweat off. relieved that whatever that was, was over.

Everything I experienced felt extremely real, I tried to think and see if I could recognize the woman I saw but nothing came to mind. I also tried thinking about the house well at least the second floor and the room I was in, trying to remember if I had seen it any where but no luck. I couldn't see much of the room, I saw what looked like drawings on the corner of the floor, most were burnt and I could only see some of whatever was drawn, they looked like what a little kid would draw on plain white paper at school or arts and crafts. There were little dressers and like cubby holes in the corners of the room. I’ve had time to think about everything I didn't notice while I was experiencing it, it all hit me after I sat down and went through it from beginning to end in my head. Well any ways thank you for reading, if you like my blog please share with friends and family, I don't get paid or anything it just feels good sharing my life experiences, and connecting with people and I need your help to do that. So Thank you so much or reading and If I don't experience anything else this month, may you have a wonderful christmas, happy holidays stay safe.

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Email- danny.alv.602@gmail.com